2015 brings tiny cabin resolutions:
1) install all wiring and insulation
2) create floor in loft
3) make stone steps to front door with
magnificent and huge granite blocks given to me by John V
4) get rid of the 2 big stumps in front
of the house
5) pull all the logs out of the river
with Randy's new backhoe
6) repair and enlarge the little
storage shed, again with Randy's new backhoe since it requires digging out the
bank
and 7)
take care of this pesky need for a $#@!
engineered septic system.
So today I begin my search for the
kindest, most considerate civil engineer on the planet, who will not take me to
the cleaners and who might even want to barter some "stamping"
services for web page development, copy editing, promotional materials, heck, I
don't know . . . fishing rights?
Anyway, here goes try #1:
Dear Mr. XX:
I am a desperate woman. I
own a tiny cabin in [town omitted because sorry, the internet is a creepy
place]. It was my goal to renovate it so
I could live in it. I’d lived in XX for
many years and sadly had to move 2 years ago due to a really awful dispute with
a neighbor that you don’t want to hear the details about. I had purchased this property with the
thought that I could remain in Hampton, albeit in a very teeny space (the cabin
is 12’ x 20’ with a loft and a proposed 8x8’ addition for the bathroom and ½ of
the kitchen area).
All was going well until the Northeast District of Health inspected
the property and told me I had to have an engineered septic plan. The wetlands agent/sanitarian for XX told me
that this was not accurate; that the perc tests passed, that all the soils were
appropriate, and that unless NE health had additional regulations in addition
to the State Health regs (which he checked, and they do not) then I was not
required legally to get an engineered plan.
I appealed their decision based on their agent’s misinterpretation of
the soils and failure to consult a soils map prior to visiting the
property. (I do not have a mortgage for
this property so a bank is not involved.)
The sanitarian and a friend who is a licensed engineer in another state
helped me perform a property survey based on surrounding state and private A2
surveys as well as conducting a day of surveying the site itself (the things I
climbed up to shoot the grades are still etched in my mind). From that they prepared a site plan and a
drawing of the proposed septic field (the contractor had already examined the
site -and had dug the test pits--and assured me that he would have no problem
installing the system.
My problem is (and you can see this coming, can’t you?) I do not have
the 5 billion dollars required to have an engineer re-create what already
exists on paper. I barely have the 3
billion required for the actual septic installation (never mind the rest of the
cabin—all I have is a roof and electricity).
I am looking for a nice, kind engineer who can examine the plans I do
have and determine how much more work he or she would need to do in order to
have this be an engineer-approved plan.
I currently live in XX but travel to XX a few times a month—I am
still considered a “resident” because of the cabin. Do you think we could make an appointment to
discuss whether you would be willing to look at what I have and see if this is
anything you might be able to be involved in?
I know it’ll cost me, I’m just hoping against hope that it does not kill
me.
I figured that I could explain this better via email instead of on
the phone. Sorry to take up so much of
your time.
Thanks so much for your consideration.
So, the line is cast, and the fly
gently floats on the water . . . until hell freezes over, probably, but
we shall see.
Can live somewhere that you can't drain
into! (For those of you thinking "get an outhouse!" that's not
the problem. It's the "effluent"--ie, gray water that concerns
these folks. They don't want it leaching into the river. the killer
is, they told me that if there had been a cistern or some type of old system
there before, I would not need an engineered plan! As though the presence
of previous harmful effluent cancelled out the potential for new flushing and
draining to be of any concern. I adore bureaucracy . . .)
